I'll tell you how my mother and I did after you tell me how you do... I think it's only fair... :)
Test for Dementia
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately . OK?
Let's find out just how clever you really are....
First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?
Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are
absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second!
Try not to screw up next time.
Now answer the second question,
but don't take as much time as you took for the first question, OK ?
Second Question:
I f you overtake the last person, then you are...?
Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?
You're not very good at this, are you?
Third Question:
V ery tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only .
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000 . Now add 30
Add another 1000 . Now add 20 . Now add another 1000
Now add 10 . What is the total?
Did you get 5000 ?
The correct answer is actually 4100.
If you don't believe it, now check it with a calculator!
Today is definitely not your day, is it?
Maybe you'll get the last question right....
.....Maybe.
Fourth Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini,
4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Did you Answer Nunu?
NO! Of course it isn't.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again
Okay, now the bonus round:
A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By
imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully
expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is
done.
Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of
sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?
He just has to open his mouth and ask...
It's really very simple....
Yes, Yes, I know it's Wednesday. Last night, after giving CJ a ride home from school because she and the hubby are down to one car (after his got totaled after an accident driving her to school one morning... see what you get by trying to carpool and be green and rushing... karma), we had a glass of wine. We still had our Mardi Gras beads on from the staff meeting that morning. Our Principal is from New Orleans so every February we can expect to get to choose from some of her many beads. Anyways, to say thanks, CJ invites me in for a glass of wine when the husband calls all excited that he just remembered what day it was, and that we should go out for a proper drink. Now money is tight this week (we get payed on Friday!!), so I've been trying to be good and not drinking too much and staying away from smokey bars, when the husband says he'll treat if I go. WELL OKAY, if you insist. We end up picking a local bar that is right in between me and CJ's house, so I can just scoot on home after a couple beers (shhhh, I KNOW). When we get there, LO AND BEHOLD, it's trivia night. Another teacher friend was meeting us (phew, no longer 3rd wheel... atleast I'm used to it with CJ and husband, sometimes I feel like the little sister.. weird?). We were so taken aback, we were not prepared with a good name like all the other teams had, so we quickly just wrote down our school's mascot and turned it in. For a Kindergarten teacher, a 1st grade teacher, a special ed teacher, and an attorney, I was proud of us. There were some very obscure questions, and the husband bailed us out big time on some of the sports questions. Sadly, the team "Those girls would be a lot hotter if they weren't smoking" pulled ahead in the bonus round. I won't say we did great, but we were upper middle pack. Next time, and there will be a next time, the Wizards will be more prepared.
and this evening, I'm so excited to FINALLY be having my happy hour date with R&WP, Barefoot, and WIDD. Lord helps us to find a date the 4 of us could get together for half priced appetizers and drinks at The Bar. But we finally did it, and wooohoo!!!
Things you have done during your lifetime..
( x) Gone on a blind date
(x ) Skipped school
( ) Watched someone die
( ) Washed, groomed and dressed someone after they died.
( ) Been to Canada
(x ) Been to Mexico
(x) Been to Florida
( ) Been to Hawaii
(x) Been on a plane
( ) Been on a helicopter
(x) Been lost
(x) Gone to Washington, DC
(x) Swam in the ocean
(x) Cried yourself to sleep
(x) Played cops and robbers
(x ) Recently colored with crayons
( ) Sang Karaoke
(x) Paid for a meal with coins only
( ) Been to the top of the St. Louis Arch
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't.
( x) Made prank phone calls
() Been down Bourbon Street in New Orleans
(x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(x ) Danced in the rain-naked
(X ) Written a letter to Santa Claus
(x) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(x) Watched the sunrise with someone
(x) Blown bubbles
(x) Gone ice-skating
(x) Gone to the movies
(x) Been deep sea fishing
( ) Driven across the United States
( ) Been in a hot air balloon
( ) Been sky diving
( ) Been bungee jumping
(x) Lay down outside at night and admired the stars while listening to the crickets
(x) Seen a falling star and made a wish
( ) Enjoyed the beauty of Old Faithful Geyser
(x ) Seen the Statue of Liberty
( ) Gone to the top of Seattle Space Needle
( ) Been on a cruise
(X) Traveled by train
(x) Been horse back riding
( x) Ridden on a San Francisco CABLE CAR
( ) Been to Disneyland OR Disney World
(x) Truly believe in the power of prayer
(x ) Been in a rain forest
( ) Seen whales in the ocean
( ) Been to Niagara Falls
( ) Been to the Olympics
( ) Walked on the Great Wall of China
( ) Saw and heard a glacier calf
( ) Been spinnaker flying
(x) Been water-skiing
(x ) Been snow-skiing
(x) Been to Westminster Abbey
(x ) Been to the Louvre
( x) Swam in the Mediterranean
(x ) Been to a Major League Baseball game
(x) Been to a National Football League game
( ) Been to Las Vegas
( x) Been snorkeling in any ocean
(x) Been naked or topless on a beach
Azaria (female kindergarten student): Ms. T, do you like black babies or white babies better?
Me: Well, sweetheart, I love all babies, no difference.
Azaria: So you'd rather have a black baby than a white baby?
Me: I'd be blessed to have any healthy baby.
Azaria: Well, my sissy is gonna have a baby and momma said we got to get rid of it, so if you want it I'll let momma know...... (wide-eyed staring at me obviously waiting for a response)
Me: I'm not ready for children yet, but thank you for thinking of me.
Azaria: But aint you 26? That's old Ms. T! My momma is only 24 and she has 3 kids! You need to find a man that will give you a baby, that's a woman's job is to have the babies. Can you not find a man, is that the problem Ms. T? (again, with the wide-eyed staring)
Me: (Lord help me, please set off the fire-alarm, make a child vomit near me, something). Azaria, it's not appropriate to talk about me having babies. Let's get back to work.
...........
As I'm walking away, barely 5 feet away, I over hear my new favorite friend whisper to her neighbor....
Azaria: We needs to finds Ms T a man so he can give her the sex and she can have the baby.
Seriously, if she and my mother were put in a room together, things would happen. But for now, I'd like to (be legally allowed t0) stick one of the below items into this beautiful child's mouth.....
I'm thinking something along these lines.... what do you think??
Well, Mr. Punxsutawny knew what he was doing. This evening, as I am sitting here writing my paper for class, I am embracing the extra time I will have. As it stands, with flurries coming down outside, nothing sticking, we already have a 2 hour delay. Though I would love the day to work on my paper, I don't want the whole day off as we have already lost a day of our spring break. That's just no fun. Especially since there more than likely won't have anything to play with. Atleast give me a snowman if we don't have schoool. But we'll worry about that in the AM.
Again, sorry for the missing in action on my part. I'm trying to start being better by checking and writing at school. I am reading! I just feel so guilty doing anything personal on school computers. My computer is currently somewhere in Texas apparently being worked on. Let's hope that's a good sign???
What does he know anyway. He's a scared little rodent that runs from his own shadow. Who is he to say there is 6 more weeks of winter.
